What do Iranians and lonely gamers have in common?

Dating market recap: 7 days ending 25 sept 2012

This week was about massive differences between Western and Eastern dating sites – and the cultural gulf that truly yawns between these two spheres.

It looks like the authorities in Iran are so fearful of the abysmal marriage rate in the Middle Eastern country, that they are actually laying the groundwork in preparation for the first-ever Iranian dating site. In a country that is notorious for its internet censorship and blocking of social media sites, such as Twitter and Facebook, the fact that Iranian authorities are so keen to bolster the failing marriage rate by allowing spouse-finding websites is a great cultural leap forward for the country, which has been criticised for its strict clampdown on personal freedoms.

Mohammad Abbasi, sports and youth minister for the country, said that as long as the ministry for culture and Islamic guidance – the department of the Iranian government that decides which websites are permitted within the country – agrees to such a dating site, Mr Abbasi’s ministry will work hand in hand to implement such a website for Iranians of marriageable age.

Meanwhile, back in the UK, one of the more tasteless niche dating sites, Shag a Gamer, has decided to launch a series of YouTube videos with an eye towards giving virgins a leg up when it comes to dating. More than one out of every three gamers have yet to engage in any sort of sexual activity, according to the no-strings-attached casual dating site, which prompted the site to come forward with ‘tips’ for socially awkward gamers.

The actual YouTube videos are horrid, starring ‘gamer babes’ that speak in double entendre, innuendo, and punctuate their words by occasionally slapping their bottoms. Gems such as ‘sometimes I need someone to overload my buffer’ and ‘fill my bandwidth’ are bandied about, proving once again that crass commercialism is alive and well in the UK – and anywhere else the Shag a Gamer service rears its ugly head.

Lads, here’s a tip – if you’ve got a scruffy neckbeard and have empty crisps packets falling from your pockets, or if you still live at home with mum and dad, no amount of ‘gamer babe’ advice will help you find a date.

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